Manipulation is a way of indirectly influencing someone else’s behavior. Because it is subtle, it can be difficult to see the hidden agenda or motives. Manipulative motives may bury themselves under feelings of obligation or love. A manipulator has an agenda. They are controlling. And allowing their influence into our life is a powerful thing. When we allow a manipulator to influence us, it can drive us in an unexpected direction, it can hold us back, or hold us down.
We Cannot Allow Others To Control Us And To Steal Our Joy
“The thief enters only to steal, kill, and destroy. I came so that they could have life—indeed, so that they could live life to the fullest.” (John 10:10)
“Consider it pure joy [meaning it’s a choice]…because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.” (James 1:2-3)
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy…” (Romans 15:13)
The Following Are A Few Things We Can Do To Gain Traction On Dealing With Manipulators In Our Life:
1. Recognize that we are being manipulated.
2. Admit that we are being manipulated.
3. Confront it, but don’t try to rationalize with the manipulator.
4. Set boundaries and stand our ground.
Our Responsibility.
We cannot allow others to dictate our mood. When others mistreat us, it is a problem they are dealing with and has nothing to do with us. We need to disconnect our moods and emotions from the behaviors of others and focus on being responsible for our own.
Most People Have Dealt With A Manipulator
We cannot put all people into the same bucket just because one (or a few) mistreated us. My Dad manipulated me my whole life and then acted innocent about it. I tried to confront him, but a manipulator will flip the script on us and make us think it’s our fault. The key to limiting this influence in our life is to realize and acknowledge that it is happening.
Listen To The Voice Inside And Seek To Please God First, Before People
We cannot walk around with blinders on. God will show us an unbalanced situation. We don’t have to suspect every person. We need to seek to please God first. When we try to please those who mistreat us, we end up trying to keep something in our life that is not meant for us. Listen to the Holy Spirit (the voice inside) and set boundaries. There is much more freedom in pleasing God than in pleasing people. I would know!